When You are Big, You are Big.

Food….we all eat food right? Even if we don’t want to, we must sha eat to stay alive. We can all agree that Lagos roads have a wiiiide menu from the regulars like gala and whatever drink you like to the more “exotic” items like akara and that fried cake-looking-thing they sell in cele (wtf is that thing). Food full ground (even for those fuckers who like eating just boiled eggs)

However some people realllly like food and it shows. It. Fucking. Shows. But there’s no harm in that unless there’s harm in that and that is exactly what happened yesterday.

I decided to take the long bus from Onyigbo to Okoko. Those buses need to be destroyed. If there was a bus that carried demons from hell to earth every Halloween night, it would be that bus. To top it all off the conductors over load…yup. We outchea sitting 5 in a row in this bitch and they don’t care o; you will squeeze that squeeze.

Now,the seat at the back of the bus already had 4 people and all that was left was that tiny awkward space for the “fifth person “. That was how this big (very big) aunty now tried to sit there (she even said “please dress”).

“Madam you no go fit enter here”……that was all it took to get her angry. She began to insult the young girl who had told her she couldn’t sit there calling her first and foremost a disrespectful prostitute and going on to tell her that she was old enough to be her mother and some more shit. I was on my seat like….

Eventually, the conductor had to intervene (even though they are the root cause) and the aunty sat somewhere else. I guess Sometimes people are safety hazards and that babe was not about that dangerous life. During the cross fire she actually said “madam call me what you want I no go allow you make you siddon for here” πŸ˜‚.

What’s the best way to address this issue? Do yall think there should be a “big bus”?


29 Comments Leave a comment

  1. Call me what you want, I no go allow make you siddon for hereπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    I once paid for the sit beside me just because πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


  2. Honestly I love your page! Thank you guys for documenting our regular and typical Eko commute adventures. I don’t go about frequently to have the big and mighty Lagosians compress my ribs, but the one that annoys me is when I open the window of the bus and someone sitting by it decides to close it on account of being cold and I’m then like why did you choose to be unfortunate by occupying the window seat, it’s very annoying. 🀦🀣p.s For the big and mighty, the next governor should put them into consideration and commission bigger buses.

    Liked by 2 people

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